Tandy: January, 2007

This month’s Tandy was:

A man tries to hold up a Burger King but just then a bus full of band students arrives to order food. The burgler has to pretend to be a manager to avoid being caught. Eventually, he is trapped in the freezer.

As the dull wheat-covered land of North Dakota met with my bored eyes, I released a deep sigh and glanced down to the flute case resting in my lap. My body was vigorously shaken as the school bus traveled across the bumpy roads, hitting my knees against the hard plastic. I was tired after playing in the parade, and was ready to go back home, yet my stomach quickly reminded me of my hunger. I took another long glance to the desolate land hidden from the dust-covered window and wondered who would build a Burger King out in the middle of nowhere.

Check Up: January 28, 2007

This week from January 21 to January 27, 2007, I have written 3,783 words on Magic Pens and 671 off. Together, this comes out to be a total of 4,454 words. This week was one of my down-weeks as I had serious writer’s block and I a lot of homework. I would have written a lot more if I didn’t have to do this big Spanish project. Also, I was mainly planning my rewrites. Maybe next week will look better. Anyways, for reading, I read the last 150 pages of DragonFlight by Anne McCaffrey, started the first 45 pages of Brian’s Winter by Gary Paulsen for a quick light read, and have read 57 pages of Romeo and Juliet.

Lost in this World: Animation!

I have finally learned how to create an animation and have made my first one about my short story, Lost in this World. For all of you fans of my story, (which is probably like two,) Lilly appears! Note that the beginning of my animation is a bit slow, but it gets better. Too bad YouTube made the sound all low-quality, otherwise, please tell me what you think!

Click here to watch it on the YouTube page.

Thanks to Kyle Andrew Ward (KAW) for the music. I used the song, Take Me Back.

REWRITE – The Horse From the Woods: Prologue Part 1/3

I have decided to rewrite my entire Horse From the Woods story from the prologue up! Well, I have rewritten this story many times from 1st grade, including in 4th, 5th, and 8th. I have once again rewritten it this year, as I am in 9th grade and you can see the immense improvements that I have made. I hope that it is better and that I have worked out all of the bugs. Please tell me what you think!

Running through the early morning moistness of the Mathurin Forest that enveloped her quaint home in obscuration, a young girl of ten brushed through the rough branches that tore at her soft-featured face. As she flailed her arms to shield herself from the treacherous twigs, her light, maple- colored hair snagged on the trees’ wooden appendages and her cheeks grew red with frustration. She frantically scanned the thick forest before her with her dark, emerald green eyes as she searched for the source of the strange sound that had impelled her to run through the wood. She quickly passed trees and bushes as the light dew that covered the grass below her feet, soaked into the leather of her boots.

Lost in this World: Rewrite Plans

Now that I have finished my short chapter story, Lost in this World, I have copied and pasted it into Microsoft Word. Without breaks in the chapters, it was about 21 pages long which is a little dissapointing. I plan to rewrite and edit the entire short story, so I would like some advice, tips, etc. Here are some simple questions that would help me make the story better. Thanks for the help!

1. What did you like?
2. What didn’t you like?
3. What did you understand clearly?
4. What didn’t you understand?
5. What needs more work?
6. What needs more detail?
7. Should I introduce that Shep is a dog at the beginning of the story?

The Horse From the Woods – Rewrite Plans

I have to admit that my main story, The Horse From the Woods isn’t that well-written and thought out. There are some bugs and junk that I have to work out and this is probably arising from the fact that I created this story when I was six. I have decided to rewrite the entire story changing things such as the main character’s, (Natalie’s,) name and working some secret stuff in that I can’t tell you about because they would ruin the whole story. I’ll have to talk to Hannah about the secret stuff because she already knows the ending. This makes me agitated because my favorite character comes up in Chapter 3 and I was almost there! Oh, well.

I would really like my new character’s name to start with an “N” because I always picture characters with a certain letter and that is hers. Some of these are really stupid, but these are the ones I thought of so far are: Niria, Nyri, Nyranie, Niarie, Nyria, Nira, Nyra, Neraina, Nirania, Nilaria, Navia, Nora, Navicia, Neticia, Nyneve, Nalana, Nalenna, Neila, Nerida, Niara, Nikara, Nadia, Nara, and Nylia.

Here are some questions to help you help me make the story better.

1. What do you like about it so far?
2. What don’t you like about it?
3. What do you understand clearly?
4. What don’t you understand?
5. What needs more work?
6. What needs more detail?
7. What bugs did you find in it?
8. What should I rename the main character?

Check Up: January 21, 2007

This week from January 14 to January 20, 2007, I have a so-so word count to display. I have written 4,526 words on Magic Pens and 645 words off. This adds up to 5,171 words. For reading, I did a lot worse than last week. I only read the prologue of Romeo and Juliet and 28 pages of DragonFlight written by Anne McCaffrey. If anybody has noticed, I usually read a lot on school days, so this 3-day school week didn’t help my reading total, and when I think of a new story, (No Longer in Darkness,) I usually replace reading-time with plan-my-new-story-time. I am shamefully guilty of that this week.

No Longer in Darkness: Chapter 2 – Fallen

I pressed lightly against the soft, dew covered ground with my walking stick. My father had carved me a new stick each year as I grew older and I had always kept it close. Each one was made to fit my height, and carved from the sturdiest of wood. My brother and I found it a tradition to venture out each year to find the perfect tree to cut from, and I always enjoyed it. I depended on my stick very much, for it was my eyes.

No Longer in Darkness: Chapter 1 – Blind Decision

“But, Father! You know that I am old enough to go!”

Our World: It Came to Me in a Dream – Chapter 5

I glanced over my shoulder to stare at my people. Their faces were filled with astonishment as their jaws dropped and their eyes widened. I noticed young children pull on their mothers’ clothing and point past me. Tears of joy began to fall from tired eyes as happiness spread over us. As we entered the lost city, a feeling of relief released the burden from my shoulders. I turned my head to join my people staring in awe at the wondrous sight before us. I smiled as I thought of the angel that had led us here. He was right! He was right! We were here! Here at last! Glancing up to the bright sky overhead, I quietly whispered, “Thank you. Thank you so very much.”

Oh, it was a sight to see!